2000-03-07 09:48:13 Couple things. Firstly, have you met Simone? She is one of my oldest and dearest friends. I tell everyone who will listen this, but we met when I accidently kicked her in a Contemporary British Fiction class we took. I was so glad I kicked her, because then we became friends and people started thinking I was cool because I knew and would hang out with her. She may try to deny it, but People Love Simone. Including me. We are partners in a kind of old west, us vs them kinda way. Because whenever we are together, we attract the WIERDEST PEOPLE. This is not an exaggeration, always the wierd people seek us out and try to be near us and bother us and creep us out. I was reminded of it this morning, when I was riding the bus, hum dee dum, and Simone happened to get on the same bus. That is nice, when you see people you know on the bus. Anyways, she sat next to me and we got to chatting, and pretty soon thereafter a guy with an ugly leather jacket and a diamond stud in one ear (a classic look!) sat near us. And Simone and I both had books open on our laps, (we're "readers," we are), and this this guy keeps making this big production about looking at us, and then craning over to look at our books, then pretending he was just turning around to look our the window, and then looking at our books some more. It's a mild example, but I hate when people do that. One other time, Simone and I went to see a movie at Harvard Square. I believe, yes, I believe the movie was called Saving Ryan's Privates, or something like that. Anyways, we sit down, and then this wierd looking middle-aged and kind of frumpy in the Cantabridgian way woman sits a few seats down and over from us. She proceeds to do a lot of rustling in and among the 5 or so plastic grocery bags she has carried with her, this woman. Slightly irritating during a MOVIE. Anyways, at long last she pulls out a banana. Fine. Nice quiet movie snack. She proceeds to eat said banana. She finishes said banana. She then proceeds to LICK the banana peel. WHO LICKS A BANANA PEEL? it seems innocuous, but it was one of the 10 creepiest and surrealist and wierdest things I've seen ever. She just kept licking and licking it, really going to town on it. It actually started to make me sick. So without much discussion at all, Simone and I move our seats way the fuck over to the middle and front. Away from her. All is fine, until a ways into the movie. This is a war movie we're at, keep in mind, but it's got quiet parts too. And during the quiet parts, there is the LOUDEST watch-ticking I've ever ever heard. It's echoing through the movie theatre. Simone and I are like: Do you hear that? What the fudge? And we realize it's from the same woman! SO IRRITATING. So that was that. And like really now, that's what I remember most about that movie. The wierd banana and shopping bag and ticking watch woman. That and how unnaturally white Matt Damon's teeth looked. There are many other examples which Simone will remind me of after she's read this, but it occured to me recently that this has been going on for exactly as long as Simone and I have lived together here in Boston. Simone graduated from JMU a year ahead of me and moved to Boston. I moved up and in with her when I graduated. And listen. When Simone was leaving her old apartment and moving into our new apartment, she met the girl who would be moving into her old apartment. She was an odd girl, wanted to move some stuff in early, whatever. Anyways, obviously this was a girl who did not know about how utilities work. For some reason, she assumed that because she was moving into Simone's old apartment, she would have Simone's old phone number! So she must have given the phone number out to every single person she ever ever ever met. Because the whole entire next year, we got wierd random calls from people asking to speak with Amy. All manner of friends and relatives, calling all hours of day and night, no joke, literally, for a year. We would just tell them they had the wrong number, and not bother getting into what a dipshit your Amy must be. k thank you very much & credits music: |
1. today is nice 3. happy yesterdays 8. thanks for hosting 4. doing other things |
(Proof that I am the only one reading.) |